Thursday, November 11, 2010

Awkward moment...

I'm at the barn grooming Ruby before saddling up. Another boarder is also tacking up and getting ready for her lesson. We're having polite conversation as she's also a student of my trainer and she's going on about her lesson and the show she's going to this weekend. Then she asks me about Ruby. Seems his owner comes to the barn at odd hours because of her schedule so the only person most of the boarders have come to associate with him is me. I explain how I'm just half-boarding him and while our trainer would like me to take him to a horse show, I feel uncomfortable doing it as he's not my horse and besides, what I really want to do again is hunter paces and maybe fox hunting.

Then she says to me, "Well, have you considered getting your own horse?"

That just stung. A most awkward moment, to say the least.

I know it was said in ignorance, and I explained my circumstances with as little dwelling on my whole horse related drama as I could. What I wanted to do was stomp my foot and say -

"Yes, you stupid twit! I can't think of anything else BUT having my own horse again. As a matter of fact, trying to find a horse on the budget I've been left with has all but broken my spirit as well as my heart. So take your big, handsome horse and do him the justice and the courtesy of riding him correctly and loving him for more than blue ribbons and bragging rights!"

It sucks to be me.


Mare said...

I'm sorry...Even though she probably didn't know, I'm sure that still hurt...Just keep hanging in there. Your next horse is out there, patiently waiting for you to find him!

OnTheBit said...

oh I feel your pain! I ALWAYS hated having to explain the situation to other people, and it much be so much worse for you because at least my Gen is still around being a very nice lawn decoration. All I can say is that sucks and I am so sorry!

Mrs Mom said...

I feel your pain all too well SM.


Ride for me. Right now I'm not even SEEING other horses.

Ashley said...

Yea that does suck! I hate when you have to bite your tongue and be nice when you so bitterly want to be like "look here you little $&%&#$^@"

Keep your head up. You will find another awesome one and the wait will be well worth it!

Dreaming said...

Oh, how tough, for you and for her. Sometimes I feel it would be nice if we all had our own embedded 'history chips' that others could scan and read so they'd know.
Hang in there. Keep writing about it. Get the pain and anger out.

Marissa said...

Ouch, I can feel that sting all the way from here. Of course it wasn't her fault, but it's still not the best idea to make assumptions about what a person is able to do with respect to horse ownership, for a variety of reasons. I'm so sorry that you had to go through such a painful conversation when you were otherwise doing one of the most relaxing activities on earth: grooming a horse. I hope your next grooming session is calm and pleasant and without that kind of chatter.

SolitaireMare said...

Dreaming, you read my mind! Most of the people I'm dealing with don't know my past and the handful of my trainer's students who know me were just little kids when I moved out with Monty 10 years ago.

How great if there was such a thing as a "history chip" and when you're new to a place you could switch it on and it would fill in the blanks for you!

My trainer is also one of my oldest friends. He's totally got my back and protecting me through all of this. It's good to feel secure knowing if I thought the comment was meant to be mean and I mentioned it to him he'd go after the girl. So I can handle it with a smile and patience.

But Ashley, "$&%&#$^@" is EXACTLY the kind of language that was REALLY going through my head at the time! LOL!

And to Mare, OTB and Mrs. Mom, thanks for keeping up the support, it means the world to me.

SolitaireMare said...

Thanks Marissa. Believe me, that's why I like to go to the barn late after work! I'm usually one of the only people there. I like my quiet time with the horse as well as not having to mind my manners around others.

Once Upon an Equine said...

Ouch. I cringed when I read the question from your fellow boarder, most likely not intended to hurt, but yeah, that would sting deep. I'm sorry.

Denali's Mom said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I read this and know that this is my biggest fear. After putting everything into Denali, money and emotions, I'm drained. I hope she finds your boys.