I am sitting here trying to work, with my stupid knee brace encased leg causing me to shift into ever increasingly uncomfortable contortions.
I didn't deserve this injury. I am not reckless, stupid or untrained. I am well aware of what my limitations are at 45 years old. And I got handed another screwing by fate. I am also depressed, angry and sad because I am 45 f'ing years old. When you break at 25 years old, your body heals and you have time. When you get broken at 45 years old, every day you lose takes you another step closer to your last ride.
I have decided that if I get out of this one and regain any of my riding, I know what I want.
I want the same kind of horse I had when I first started all this. I want the same horse I had as a kid that opened this whole world up to me and made it fun. The requirements are pretty simple:
1) Gelding. I will N E V E R go near a damn mare again. After my black mare I should have learned there will never be redemption in my experience for a mare.
2) Chestnut. My first horse was a beautiful liver chestnut. And I loved him as only a girl will love her first horse.
3) Quarter Horse or Quarter Horse cross. I know there are a few QH left in this world who are at least 16.2 hands tall. My first horse was a QH/Morgan cross and my second horse was a QH/TB cross. Sound, sane and just good hearted riding horses.
4) Has NO vices under tack. My first horses were green broke when I got them but they NEVER bucked, reared or bullied me. This time I want a horse who's a little older but just as trustworthy.
And if that no longer exists in this world, then screw horses.